Article About Me Written By Galena Gazette's Reporter

11/14/2006 6:17:00 PM Email this article • Print this article



'We are brotherhood'

by Amy Alderman

Whether you are sitting next to Dayu Dara Permata at a cafeteria, or watching her recite a Muslim prayer, you know you are sitting next to someone special.

"We are brotherhood," said the Indonesian exchange student while talking about how mankind is a brotherhood under three religions.

Dara came to the U.S. from Indonesia as part of the Youth Exchange and Study (YES) program, which was set up after 9-11 to try to educate and reintroduce people to Muslims. YES joins together three foreign exchange programs, including the American Field Service (AFS) program, in which Jo Daviess County schools partner. Dara won a highly sought after full ride scholarship. Usually the cost for AFS exchange students is $7,600. The local Jo Daviess County AFS chapter provides funds and social activities for her to meet other exchange students.

Dara is an 18 year old teenager from Depok, a suburb of South Jakarta. Her hometown is a city of 1.3 million people. She is living with Frank and Norma Schwirtz in Elizabeth, a town of roughly 700 people. She's called them dad and mom since the first ten minutes when they met.

Her bright personality lights up a room with insight, acceptance and determination. She is educating herself and others with her time here.

By integrating herself into American culture, she is a walking example of the Muslims of Indonesia, which has 250 million people, 88 percent of whom are Muslim.

She attends River Ridge high school where instead of wearing a uniform, staying in one classroom year round and kissing the hands of her teachers, she wears American clothes and listens to her fellow students have friendly discussions with their teachers.

She prays four times a day-at 3:30 a.m., before school, after school and before she goes to sleep.

She talks openly about her beliefs. She explains the Muslim religion includes 25 prophets, one of whom is Jesus Christ. Mohammad, the last prophet, gave Muslims the Qur'an, their holy book. The three largely followed religions-Christianity, Muslim and Judaism were each fathered by the same man-Abraham, making all followers of these religions brothers, said Dara.

She says her prayers remind her of God and keeps her disciplined.

"I believe there is a power outside of human beings that created the universe and takes care of all living things inside it. I am grateful for everything we have inside it (the universe). We can breathe, we can speak. There are some things humans can't explain and the answer is only in God."

"For me we have our own power to choose (how conservative or liberal) we are. . . I have Muslim inside myself. I respect all religions because there's nothing right or wrong about religion. I'm very sad because people argue or get mad about religion."

She talks about the radical Muslims in Iraq, Iran and Palestine. "We are just ordinary Muslims," she said about the mainstream people of Indonesia.

And she is not here to preach. She endured a nine month application process to be part of showing the U.S. that most Muslims are not terrorists of the radical jihad terrorist group.

"People say jihad is a holy war. Jihad is not a holy war. Jihad is a struggle within ourselves. They are people who cannot control their emotions," she explained.

While she came to the U.S. prepared for discrimination, she has not encountered any such thing from the people of Jo Daviess County. "I'm very surprised and grateful. People here are very welcoming and open minded."

Dara seems more like the most popular girl in school as she sits at a cafeteria table, where teachers and students wave and say hi with bright smiles, which seem to be contagious stemming from the foreign exchange student.

At the time of the interview, she was fasting during Ramadan, the ninth month of the Muslim calendar, which is considered the most holy time of the year for Muslims. It is a time for spiritual reflection and prayer, and celebrates the time when the Qur'an was written. Dara could not eat between sunrise and sunset. At the end of the day, a prayer is said, followed by a meal called the iftar. At home, the end of Ramadan "Id-al-Fitr" is celebrated with gifts and friends and families share large meals. Some cities have fairs celebrating the last days of Ramadan.

In Elizabeth, Dara shared a meal with her host parents who said "Happy Ramadan!" Dara ate a casserole and bread, which she dressed with hot sauce, which she puts on just about everything.

Before and after Ramadan, friends, teachers and high school principal Tom Akers warned her of cafeteria food with pork, which is against her religion to eat. "I am very glad because my friends respect me."

Differences

Everything is different from her life in Depok, said Dara. The way people talk, act and treat each other contrast from the life she's always known. "There is a different concept of respect. Here it is more liberal. In my country, it is quite conservative."

"We never say hi. We kiss our teachers hand and (bow)." Indonesians raise their hands to their foreheads and bow to their family members.

Students are taught to not speak against their teachers. Here, she listens to her peers discuss and argue issues with her government/history teacher Mike Dittmar.

"My friends might argue with the teacher or complain about homework. At home, we're never allowed to argue with the teacher."

She studies five to six subjects a day in the same classroom in Depok. Here, she runs through a schedule of nine classes a day.

There are positives and negatives in both schools of thought, said Dara. She also believes students are lucky to go to school near where they live.

Education at home for Dara is competitive. There are six public high schools and over 100 private schools in Depok. There are six levels of high school, the first level being the highest accredited. She succeeded in national tests during middle school to gain acceptance into the first level school.

Friendship is an intimate word for Indonesians. "In Indonesia, when you say this is my friend, you know everything about them." Dara noticed friendship is more casual in the U.S., where people call each other friends easily. She feels Americans respect privacy when others have problems, where at home, Dara's friends flock to each other when there is a problem.

Keeping active

One of the main reasons AFS students are chosen is for their community involvement. At home, Dara was a part of community service and youth groups. She helped organize social events and charities to help people pay their bills. Here she is in the movie club and worked on a fundraiser for the Make a Wish foundation. She reads, studies and attends AFS functions. Her host parents have taken her out for dinner and plan trips to Chicago to see the Christmas decorations and to Woodfield Mall for a shopping excursion.

Frank, a recovering alcoholic, took Dara to an alcoholics anonymous meeting to help her better understand his addiction. Just as Dara opens her beliefs and trials to the world, her host parents wanted to be open with her about their trials. "I like to hear about people who want to improve themselves," said Dara. "They're (group attendees) very open, honest and shared their feelings."

Dara also attended Frank's daughter and son-in-law's church in Sparta, where Dara spoke about her religious beliefs to their congregation.

Frank was surprised to learn that Dara didn't know about the Holocaust of World War II. They watched "Schindler's List" together, when Dara wondered how the dictator Adolf Hitler came to believe in ethnic cleansing. She asked if it stemmed from Darwinism, and wept for all of the 8 million people who were killed under his rule.

On the lighter side, Frank is also educating Dara on his love for music, playing Charlie "the Bird" Parker and Miles Davis.

Selecting each other

A spiritual director for Christ in the Woods retreat center, Frank believes Dara's presence at their home, the school and the community is meant to be.

The couple have hosted students from around the world, and were particularly interested in Dara's religion.

"We want to learn as much from them as they wants to learn from us," said Norma about their AFS experiences.

The Schwirtz family sifted through nearly a dozen AFS applicants last year. The students were from Africa, Turkey, Italy, and then there was Dara. "One morning I was reading Dara's application. I said Dara's it."

"We went through several applications. A quote really grabbed me," said Norma.

"Life is a choice. Succeed or fail. Win or lose. Each has its own risk. If we want to be a winner we must prepare ourselves on probably being a loser. That is my method, which I attempted to overcome failure. It has been prevailing as my attitude, at all. Yet, be certain that I never ever give up to any challenge."

Her parents said she is studious, persevered and is family orientated. The Schwirtzes, parents of three grown children, feel she fits in well at their home. "You go by faith and you are given so much, " said Frank. "We are blessed."

He further explained they are blessed "by Dara's honesty, her sincerity, her love for us as a family, her insatiable desire to learn about our culture and anything that has effected our history in our last century."

"She is a joy to have. We've learned a lot about the Qur'an and the Islamic faith. It is amazing how similar they are," said Norma. Dara hopes to one day be an ecologist, biologist or a diplomat. "We heard a lot of issues after 9-11. I heard about the negative image people have of Muslims. I want to be a diplomat. I want to know how people are thinking."

Today, she already is a diplomat among all who meet her.

Dara will be here until late June 2007. She will return to Depok to finish her last year of high school, and is considering college in the U.S.

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